Tuesday, August 14, 2018

This is a hard one.

 Baby K Feb 2018
Baby K July 2018

This post is a hard one that I have been putting off for this
long because it was a big hurt that took time to heal. Its still a 
little tender but God is good and I Praise Him.
We were blessed to run along side this boy (our boy)
for 5 months. He was a Joy. This was the first time I
had a baby bond so quickly and fully to me. When we 
got baby K we were told he is going to be adopted so he
may be with us a while and that was fine with us. We did 
all the court visits as mom was given chances to change her
mind, after the first court visit mom stopped coming. We
would still go, make an appearance, then be excused 
until the next court date ( CPFSA was doing all 
the needed work between dates to get rights terminated
so he could be placed with his forever family.)
The end of May was the termination hearing. They wanted
to move him into a long term home at that time (as we
are just a short term place of safety), but my momma heart
said no, and I fought to keep him. They let us.... fast forward to July.
 I keep checking in with CPFSA (didn't know if
I should make travel plans as usual or not if we
would still have Baby K with us) and they are telling
me it will be probably 3-4 months for him to be placed with his
forever family, so we let them know we are willing to keep him
until he is placed. But then we learn the mom is dragging her feet, 
she doesn't want to sign off on the papers to terminate rights. 
Come to find out, after
the monthly placement meeting in July, That the bio mom has
changed her mind and wants him back. CPFSA then gives her a year (so
from now until the summer of 2019)
to find a place to live and get a job so she can care for him. Visitaion
would start this fall to help with the bonding. 
Then they turn to us. They are willing to let us keep him, but it will be another
year.... I wasn't ready for that. I didn't expect ever getting a choice.
Every time before we would get 
 a call and get a baby, we get another call the baby goes.
My mommas heart was crying out YES! keep him, protect him
love him, don't let him go to another children's home.
But then God spoke up reminding me "you can't pour out of 
an empty vessel" and I knew thats where I was at. I had been feeling
guilty about the 'leftovers' Neiah had been getting that summer because 
there was a lot going on and a lot of back and forth with Baby K's situation.
I had to think of her and how another year loving on Baby K would effect 
her and him. Would he be able to bond fully to his bio mom if he was already
bonded to Neiah and I? How would it effect Neiah (and me) to have him for
15 months then have to let him go.... what if after the year the bio mom still
didn't have her things together and we were back at square one him being 
put in a long term home... What if.....
Then I opened up and read in Samuel and it specifically talked 
about David staying at En Gedi and how Saul was chasing him, but
David stood firm that he would not kill Saul because God 
had placed him in authority, and David respected that authority. 
What that spoke to me is I am David at En Gedi, CPFSA is 
the authority. They see the big picture in these situations 
with the babies and families, they know things I do not.
I need to respect that and not try to fight them for what 
I think is best for the child, when I can't see the big picture.
So after a lot of tears and a hard goodbye, Baby K was 
taken and placed in a different home, so he can start
visiting and bonding with his bio mom.
I am so thankful for a great big God who loves our Baby K
so much more then Neiah and I. I am so thankful that I 
can turn to him and He can grant me the peace and healing/calm
that only He can. He knows, He understands. This is the first
time things have gone this way and it was hard, BUT I know all
the babies placed with us will not be "ideal' situations, and that we
must Trust God even in the hard, even when we want to muscle it
on our own and do what we think is best. God is Good. Always. 
The End.

Prayers appreciated for Baby K and his bio mom as they start
visitation this Sept. Prayers appreciated for Neiah and I as we
get ready (after a much needed break) to head home and take
in any others that Jesus needs us to love and run along side.
Thanks.

Saturday, June 9, 2018

Sea Container

Last week we were blessed with the arrival of one
of Harvest Calls bi annual sea containers, and with it
came donations, and supplies that (Lord Willing) will
help us the next 6+ months.
An added blessing of this was the timing of the 
sea containers arrival to us from port, was the same
time that a Harvest Call team was at JDV (where we unload 
the sea container to sort and later distribute using box trucks.)
It was a huge blessing to have the extra hands as we unloaded, 
(it arrived at 10 p.m. at night), and then the next few days sorted, 
and reloaded into box trucks to be delivered to the local ministires
we support En Gedi included.
It was also wonderful to have lots of eager hands that were willing to 
hold and play with a cute baby boy so I could spend a few hours each 
day focused on the sea container distributions.

So thankful another one is done and we are now set up
for the next few months!

Running Away

In May the kids and I were blessed with a long weekend (Labor Day
here in Jamaica). Neiah was off school, and this gave us the 
perfect opportunity to run away for the weekend.
 We were able to get a good price on a hotel we love and is 
very kid friendly.
 for 4 days we spent our days going back and forth from the pool
 to the beach/ocean.
This time away was very much needed all around. I am so thankful
God blessed us with this opportunity for us to relax, slow down 
and just have fun for a few days.
Now back to reality.

Wednesday, April 11, 2018

The last few weeks

 Happy Easter from us here at En Gedi!
Neiah loves her role as big sister
Last week we were able to stop at New Hope for 
a few mins. It was so good to see the kids there and
so funny to watch them respond to little K. Most
of them acted like they have never seen a little
baby before.
 After spending the last 3 out of 4 weeks up at KP
with teams we are done, and back home.
Now the catch up begins.
 Both Neiah and K love being outside we 
we spend lots of time out in the yard.
 This boy is a little chunk.
Soon his thighs are going to be to big for this seat.
Neiah's newest pupil for class.

Saturday, March 31, 2018

Love You M

This past Monday the boys went to court. We were told to have M's
bags packed as there was a chance he would go with family.
 It was a long day at court, but in the end M was able to go home with
Grandma and Uncle who were both there, wanting him, trying to
care for him before he was removed, but because of his bio mom's 
mental condition she never gave them the opportunity. Now that 
(Lord willing) bio mom is in a place getting the proper help she needs,
Grandma and Uncle were ready and willing to step up and care for M.
 We will miss this goof. (Neiah probably most of all as he was
her #1 play buddy), but we are so THANKFUL that he is back
with his bio family that have been fighting for him, and wanting 
to take care of him. Prayers appreciated as they transition into 
this new normal.
Little K we get to hang out with for a while longer. His mom was 
there, and she would love to take him home, But she is very young,
has another baby already at home, and grandma is unable or unwilling
to financially provide for another grand baby. Little K is adoptable
and is now waiting to be matched with his forever family.
Prayers appreciated that he is matched quickly so proper bonding
can happen. 

Saturday, March 17, 2018

Finding a New Groove

 This past week was a busy one. We are thankful for a low key
weekend where we can catch up on our rest. And it always helps
to have a resting buddy.
Little Boy... Big Couch.
 Fresh and clean.
This past week the boys and I spent our days
up at Kp helping to host the team there.
 The boys got to experience the big tree cookout for 
the first time.
 This team is such a blessing. Not only in their friendships and 
how we get our 'tanks' filled during our time with them, but they
also blessed us with bringing us formula and rice cereal for the boys,
and willing hands to help out with them whenever needed.
 The Amazing Iowa team that blessed us this past week.
This past weekend, we were also blessed with a visit from
Grandma Kris and Grandpa Neil. They were able to stay with us
over the weekend, and were such a huge help with Neiah and the
boys. We were so blessed by and Thankful for them!

Wednesday, March 7, 2018

A Little Catch Up...

Happy New Year.... In March.
I feel like we hit the ground running when we
got back from the states in March. I knew I was
coming back to the electrical situation that still
wasn't solved, But PRAISE JESUS! it now is.
I am HAPPY to say that En Gedi is now
'officially' done with the electrical passing 
of the house. 
In January all the electrical lines running 
from the outside of the house to the main 
road, had to be ripped out and replaced with
a 'heavier' wire that was able to carry the
load of the house, and get us a 'pass' on 
the electrical inspection. It was NOT a very fun 
2 weeks but I am thankful its now done.
In Feb. the JOC was here and we were blessed
by their visit and all the time and effort they put in
for us here in Jamaica and at En Gedi.
In Feb. I was also able to have a good talk with 
the head of CPFSA (formally CDA) at the
Mandeville office (where we work out of) to
make sure En Gedi was still ok and met all
the requirements with the recent restructuring 
of CDA (Child Development Agency) to CPFSA
(Child Protection & Family Services Agency).
Some of the questions I had for her she was unable
to answer. So I was able to set up a call with the 
head of child placement for CPFSA island wide to try and get 
answers to my questions. Ms Shirley was very
helpful and assured us that we are exactly where
we needed to be.
A few weeks later we got a call that 2 little boys
were in need of some care. We were happy to
be able to say Yes.
 We welcomed 1 month old Little K
He is a little smuggler who is not a fan of mornings.
Thankfully so far nights have not been
bad with him waking up just a few times
and going right back to bed. Please be prayerful
for him as they look to find him a forever family.

 And 5 month old Little M
This boy is perfection! He is so laid back,
I didn't hear him really cry the first 5 days he was
here. He only fusses when he is getting
hungry or tired. Other than that he just
sits and smiles at you, or talks with you,
and chews on his hands.
PRAISE JESUS! He is a rockstar sleeper
and thus far has been sleeping 12-13 hours
a night.
Please be prayerful for him as there is limited
documentation as of now I only know his first name.
I don't have a surname, a birth date. there is no 
immunization book/ for him. Prayers as he gets
placed with his forever family.
 Neiah fell right back into Big Sister mode
with great excitement. I think Little M
would be her favorite as he has now
become her sole student in her class she
teaches, and she now has someone to listen to 
her chat on and on, and he just follows her
around with his eyes and smiles:)

Our first Sabbath going to church with the boys.
Praise Jesus for a great church family 
that jumped in and helped with the boys
so I can still interpret for church.

I am thankful to say I have been contacting
and have found some ladies to run along side us
and help with the boys. Prayers for us all
as we get this all figured out. This is so new for
all of us and a big learning curve for me. Please
be prayerful as we could use some more 'helpers'
especially at night to take care of the boys so I can
get some sleep.

Thanks
Blessings
Erin